Ny new job

I started a new job recently. And let me say, this job is AWESOME. Not because of the pay (which could be better), not because of the location (suffice it to say we have anti-graffiti paint on our walls and the little buggers still tag it); not because of the hot men that work there (trust me on this one); but for a couple of other very important things.

1. I can wear sweat pants to work. Do you know how great it is to be able to wear pants that have a drawstring to work. Now, some of you may be thinking that these pants should only be worn by grandma's with protruding bellies and a hump on their backs. While you may be right with this line of thinking, I believe, in my heart of hearts, that pants with drawstrings and elastic waistbands are very underrated. I am pretty sure that if I get married again, it will be in sweatpants (I did the dress the first time, be-atch). I can also wear my favorite tee-shirts to work. Amongst these favorites are my Calahan Auto Parts shirt, the Truffle Shuffle Shirt, and of course, Matt Foley.

2. Andi, my new friend at work, has the EXACT same sense of humor I do! It's strange. Granted, she wears shiny Napoleon Dynamite boots, but the fact that they are Coach boots, I can forgive her. We both have an irrational lust for Steve Perry, and thus LOVE all the Journey songs we hear everyday!!! I am of the opinion that no one ever told Steve Perry that he is a boy- I am pretty sure that he has hair extensions. And then there is the famous mustache shaving scene. I have never laughed so hard in my entire life.

3. My coworkers are just as down to earth as I am. One told me that her life is ruined because of all her black chin whiskers.

4. They all think that poo and farts are funny. It is so great when someone runs into the office, does a little crop dusting, and then runs away like a chicken. Then the boss comes out and looks at all of us and blames us for the stink bomb.

5. I am not the only one who drinks before noon on Saturdays. It's nice to know I have some company.

and Finally...

6. we all have skills.....Ninja skills, bow hunting skills, computer hacking skills.....

11 days of International Observations...The Condensed Version

I am gleefully home from my mis-adventures in Mexico. I think that I will start with a list of things that I will be talking about as they relate to my trip: (though not necessarily in order, and not necessarily today).....seriously folks-- this all happened in 11 days.... Feel free to ask about any or all of these adventures. I am verbose and MAN OH MAN do I have stories to tell!!!!!

1. I believe there should be a separate compartment for "people" under the age of 10 on airplanes. JESUS kid- can you blink without kicking my chair?

2. Old fashioned planes-- what REALLY goes on behind that navy blue veil which separates the carpet-baggers from us regular folk? Why do THEY get the warm cloths after a long flight? Why do they get real forks (and food, for that matter) and the whole can of soda?

3. When they say fly direct into Cozumel, there is a reason for that....it took about 37 days to get from LA to the hotel.

4. They do not believe in lines in Mexico. This is a very valuable lesson when you are waiting in a line for a ferry on a dock after being in a small seat in front of four people sitting in three seats (see number 1 on the list).

5. Docking in Cozumel.....the Ellis Island of resorts.....

6. Two Words: Clown Car.....

7. 11 days with my immediate family with no internet and no cable.....if I can survive that, I can survive anything!

8. "It's only my opinion".....

9. Where else can you find 6 tee-shirts for $20? Once washed they get really short and really wide- but they are good for a wearing.....

10. They sell antibiotics over the counter!

11. Drunkeness in front of parents; now that is the way to have a vacation.

12. So many lizards, iguanas, snakes with legs?

13. Exactly what can I eat/drink? What water is filtered? Was that lettuce washed in filtered water? What about the ice? How can I brush my teeth?

14. (Sensitive readers, please proceed to #15)- 8 days without a poo; but it was glorious when it came to fruition.

15. There seem to be two distinct age brackets from the many, many, many cruise ships which go to these islands: Girls who are 19 and have really long gross hair and walk around town in bikinis and flip flops (some with big hoop earrings, cigarettes, odd piercings, and HUGE sunglasses) and couples who are about 119 and have been sleeping in seperate beds for many, many years.

16. All the shops look the same; and they seem to sell the same 6 shirts.....

17. A salt-water "water" park....an interesting idea. It didn't work for me.

18. There should also be a separate compartment for "people" under the age of 10 at the hotel. It's just my opinion.

19. New Year's Eve--- those "pirate-technics" were probably pretty good. I was too busy hanging my head over the side of the boat. And can you believe I didn't even drink? What a story to tell......

20. Kittens running loose in the airport. I know I am not home!!

21. Apparently you have to tip EVERYONE.

22. Eurpoean women who are about 6 months pregnant smoke.

23. Who would have thought I oculd go on vacation for 11 days and lose weight? Strange, eh?


There are so many, many more things to discuss. I am pretty sure I will be digesting this trip for years to come. I am happy to be home and sleeping with my kitty!